So today…I am going there. I am addressing an embarrassing topic for most. Yup, I. Got. Dumped. Kicked to the curb, carried, left alone, all of the above. The most beautiful thing about it is I’ve actually grown from it. I mentioned in the first post that this blog was going to be about my journey, and relationship struggles has been a portion of my life. We all idolize these #relationshipgoals, but forget about reality WITHOUT the hashtag. Keep reading to see what going through the struggle taught me.1. I am stronger than I think. Since I love strong and hard, a failed relationship seemed like it would break me. To prevent myself from going through pain, or God forbid starting all over again, I would hold on to the last thread of a relationship. The strangest thing is, when my ex said those four horrible words: ‘We should be friends.’ I was not broken. There was no long sappy night full of tears, or multiple pages of text messages. The stronger you are, the easier it is to accept what cannot be changed.
2. It was not my fault. After a long term relationship is over both parties probably dwell on what happened, what went wrong, or what mistakes they’d made. I sat back and I evaluated it all, and realized it wasn’t something I’d done, nor was it something of his doing. It just wasn’t meant to be. If it doesn’t fit, don’t force it, and people have to learn to be okay with it.
3. It’s okay to be alone. LORD!!! I almost hollered. I HATE being alone. That empty feeling. Who do I call about good news? Who do I cuddle with? Who can I sit around and do nothing with? Argue about dishes with? These are the little things that an insecure person has to toggle around with after a break up. Okay…honest declaration: I thought these things as the relationship started to go downhill. BUT guess what? All of these things are not worth having, if you are not sharing them with the right person. Hell…share them with yourself. Congratulate yourself, take yourself on date, get a drink and get over it. Accept and love yourself because it feels damn good.
4. This ones a toughie. When you and your significant other break up, he breaks up with your family too. Be careful how close your family gets to your boyfriend and vice versa. Although you can establish great relationships, or long lasting friendships in some cases, but in others you can earn a clan full of awkward social media enemies.
5. I am a complete person without a man. As I approach 30, I get more and more antsy about getting married, having more children, buying our first home together etc. etc. I felt like once I reached all of these milestones my life would be complete. Wrong! If you believe your life is incomplete, it will continue to be that way. If you live a purposeful, focused and full life no matter the circumstance…it will continue to be that way. You know the question: is the glass half full, or half empty? It’s the same thing with being single. Or really in ANY situation. Life is what you make it.
Yup. I am still living, and my blog is the best boyfriend I could ever have. I hoped this enlightened a few minds. The outfit details are below. Ciao!
Thigh High Booties: Shoedazzle. I’ve had these for almost three years, and only worn them three times.
Sleeveless Jacket: Boohoo
Hat & Glasses: Forever 21